CEO of The National Society of Leadership and Success, one of the largest accredited leadership honor societies in the United States.
Whether you’re a recent graduate who’s deep in the thick of a job hunt or further along in your professional journey, one of the smartest things you can do to future-proof your career and ensure success is become a better on-the-job teacher and learner.
It’s worth our time and energy to understand learning and teaching as two sides of the same skill. Generational differences may be somewhat overstated in some online corners, but there’s no denying that people have vastly differing preferences when it comes to taking in new information.
Here are five tips to improve your coaching and learning skills at work:
1. Know what it means to be coachable.
A curious, malleable mind is an invaluable asset for a student or emerging professional in any context. Whether you call it a “beginner’s mind” or “a growth mindset,” an openness to new knowledge fueled by a lively curiosity and a lack of preconceived notions or expectations is something of a superpower. With that kind of open-hearted learning, your job is easier, whether you’re the one learning or the one teaching.
We can call this quality “coachability.” To help develop your own coachability, pay attention to nudges of curiosity about any aspect of what you’re studying. No matter how slight it might feel initially, if you can stoke your natural curiosity, you’ll find yourself more open to the learning process.
2. Embrace the art of giving good feedback.
Many of us find it difficult to offer feedback that might seem critical—especially to our peers and colleagues. If this is a struggle for you, resolve to keep your focus on the problem or challenge instead of on the individual you’re giving feedback to. You can do this by focusing on communicating concrete examples that you’ve observed rather than on conclusory judgments.
Here are a few other tips for delivering good feedback:
• Stay objective, but also try to maintain empathy.
• Be open to receiving feedback and new or mitigating information. There may be obstacles of which you weren’t previously aware.
• Don’t forget the positive notes. Mentioning what the person is doing right helps them have a deeper sense of trust in your suggestions.
The purpose of feedback is to help improve performance—not to be critical or manage an employee—so make sure you offer concrete suggestions to help the person’s performance improve. And remember to never give feedback unless it’s specifically requested or included in your job description.
3. Know how to receive feedback and integrate it.
From time to time, most of us will find it difficult to take in what we perceive to be negative or critical opinions. Yet, we need to find a way to stay open to honest input from others, even when it’s not completely complimentary.
We can be more open to receiving feedback by keeping all egos out of the discussion. Don’t focus on personalities or past interactions. Instead, focus on your mutually shared purpose: to improve performance and thereby support your organization’s goals in some way.
It’s also important to listen openly and fully without interruptions. It’s tempting to want to defend yourself, but becoming defensive only serves to make the discussion tense and unproductive. It is OK, however, to ask questions and clarify points to make sure you understand the feedback being offered.
Always end by thanking the other person for their input and asking for some time to reflect on the feedback before making appropriate changes. And of course, understanding when to take constructive feedback and when to ignore unwarranted criticism is an important skill to develop, too.
4. Become a raving fan of accountability.
It’s hard to trust a person who seems addicted to making excuses for poor performance or missed goals. The cure is to become a raving fan of accountability for yourself and others. Whether you’re holding yourself accountable for meeting your goals, your employer’s expectations or your job’s performance requirements, it’s crucial to develop a sense of personal integrity. It’s also a large part of being coachable and learning from others at any age.
Resolve right now to drop the excuses and rationale. Seek to understand the factors and circumstances that led to a less-than-ideal outcome so that you can improve on them later, but don’t let those reasons become justifications. Holding yourself accountable helps demonstrate to your supervisors and bosses—as well as to yourself—that you’re ready to lead others.
5. Pay attention to what you’re saying.
Your communication with colleagues doesn’t end with the words you choose. It’s not even just about the way you say what you say. You’re speaking all the time through your facial expressions, body language, eye contact, posture and gestures. For example, are you mirroring the other person’s language and posture? Are you coming across as too intense? Do you sound confrontational?
It’s all too easy, unfortunately, to alter how others perceive your words and feelings by simply not matching nonverbal communication cues to the substance of your speech. They’ll remember how you made them feel long after they’ve forgotten specific words you used. Focus first on maintaining eye contact without forcing a staring contest. Also, try to remain aware of your facial expressions. Otherwise, you might find your face betraying how you really feel despite your carefully measured words. And since not everyone gives and receives verbal and nonverbal communication in precisely the same way, it’s good to be aware of how to make this practice more inclusive whenever we can.
In conclusion, the ability to learn and teach well are two highly sought-after skills today’s employers are looking for, and staying open to the process of learning from peers in a variety of contexts is a prized trait in future leaders. Seek out opportunities to demonstrate your coachability and interest in growth to stand out on the job and support your career success.
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